The Act Is Over
by Kunisaki
Summary: I throw it off, I'm sick of pretending, had enough... The show is over, Hikaru...


**The Act is Over**

**Author:** Kunisaki

**Pairings:** Hikaru Hitachiin X Kaoru Hitachiin

**Genre:** Angst/Hurt/Comfort

**Disclaimer: **Yeah, yeah, I know. I don't own Ouran High School Host Club, or anything from the anime/manga.

**Warning:** Unbeta'ed.

**Summary: **"I throw it off, I'm sick of pretending, had enough…" the show is over, Hikaru…

**Author's note: **This is a story based on a poetry I have written, the heading show the name of it. Well, please enjoy!

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_Can't take this anymore, I hate it when I have to hide, behind the mask_

He was sitting on one of the couches of the host club, staring outside the large window in his direction.

He kept every talks and voices out of his head. He gazed through nothing, as he was deeply lost in his mind, and didn't pay any attention at all.

He was tired, tired of this stupid hosting-thing.

What was the big deal of it? He has lost his reasons to be here, and he didn't seem to be enjoying himself.

But why was he here then?

"Ooi, Kaoru." The said teen turned his head towards his mirror image.

His twin, Hikaru, had been concerned about his brother's behavior, and he first now took the option to speak up.

"Is there something that bothers you?"

The twin, called Kaoru, kept his eyes half-lifted on his brother. He wore an expressionless face, not wanting to respond at all. He sighed, closing his eyes only to open them up again. Now, his face softened. He looked away from Hikaru's gaze, turning his head to the other side.

"It's nothing, I'm just tired."

Tired? Yes, tired as it is. Kaoru was tired of this life he had, it made it so exhausting to keep on the pretending. He was tired of the mask he had to wear on, the mask that showed a smile and happiness. The Hitachiin didn't truthfully feel the happiness, he was lying about that he was fine, he didn't feel glad anymore. That was a long time ago.

Hikaru looked away, keeping his eyes on the floor. Sighing, he replied back. "If you say so…"

Kaoru hated this. He hated it whenever his elder brother would talk like this, in such a pity tone.

It gave the younger one the want to stab himself, letting the blood keep oozing out of his scars.

"Hikaru… I didn't mean th-…" the younger twin had spoken weakly, but got cut-off by another creature from the miserable life he lived in.

"Hikaru, can I talk to you?" the person said. A female student, dressed up as a boy, to disguise her identity. That girl had messed up his entire world, and still… she was so innocent and blunt that it almost made Kaoru want to throw up.

"Sure, Haruhi." Hikaru responded, and left his seat from the couch.

_Sits at the corner there, dark shadows darken up the place, still hides the face_

It was so disrupting. Every time the girl and his brother talked together, Kaoru couldn't stop feeling that damn emotion inside.

Jealousy - what an irritating bother.

_I'm tired of this fake_

Kaoru gritted his teeth, when he saw the two laughing together. He definitely felt lousy and miserable. What he hated the most was that Hikaru never noticed his pretending - his act. That only meant that they were falling apart. He was going lose his mind, if he didn't turn away from the sight.

Screaming inside of him, Kaoru tightened the grips he held on his blue school uniform-jacket, cursing himself for being so weak.

"_I throw it off. I'm sick of pretending, had enough of this shit."_The teen whispered darkly, he felt his power to stay calm crashing down and ruined, like a piece of meaningless fragile glass.

Hikaru had somewhat turned his gaze on his younger sibling - Kaoru looked like he was in pain, which caused the elder of them to walk over towards him at once. He forced his twin to look at him by planting his hand on the pale cheek, turning his head gently.

"Kaoru, you're not okay. Tell me what's wrong."

It was more an order than a question, and Kaoru groaned inwardly in annoyance. He didn't want to tell, but had the feeling to shout it out.

"It's nothing Hikaru, really." He lied to his mirror image once again.

Hikaru frowned, he couldn't make Kaoru to tell and admit his pain, which made him rather upset.

"Stop paining yourself and tell! Did you think that I wouldn't notice!?" the elder redhead hissed in frustration at the younger one.

He grabbed on his collar, causing Kaoru to stand up in front of him.

The others stared at the two, quite shocked by his actions.

Kaoru remained silent. He had lowered his head down, as his hair shaded the amber-eyes of his. No words were leaving through his lips.

"Kaoru! Say something!" Hikaru raised the voice.

He went quiet, when the younger twin gazed up. Hikaru found anger in his eyes.

"_I've given up at this, the act is over."_ The older brother couldn't quite understand what he heard, but he had a bad feeling what his twin was talking about.

"I'll tell you what's wrong, Hikaru. It's my whole entire life, I'm sick of it! I'm sick of this damned thing, and how we act at the host club! I hate it, I hate it so much! I hate _you_ Hikaru, but most of all; I hate how you _can't tell at all!!"_

It was like the end of a play they have done, _curtains drawn across the scene_, he knew what his twin was thinking. He didn't like it.

"_It's over for you and me,_ Hikaru." Kaoru said while locking their eyes at each other, his voice had no emotion at all, as he spoke.

Hikaru was speechless; he couldn't believe his eyes or ears. He has seen in Kaoru's eyes, they were so pained, with hatred, hurt and full of sorrow. Had Kaoru always felt this pain and sadness? How long has it been? Why didn't he figure it out before!? "Kaoru…" Hikaru moved one of his hands towards his brother's pale cheek. He just wanted to understand.

"DON'T TOUCH ME!" the younger shouted, and the other twin winced by the scream in front of his face.

The whole entire room went silent. None of the host members, designators or Hikaru knew that Kaoru would do such a scream.

Kaoru slapped his twin's hand to the side, breaking him free.

As he stood there, he knew that Hikaru wouldn't really understand it - understand what Kaoru had been through and was feeling.

"_It's is how I truly feel_, Hikaru. I'm _breaking down inside of me;_ it's _just how it is."_ The younger brother lowered his voice down.

Kaoru had become cold-hearted by time in this misery, that he didn't feel sorry for causing Hikaru to fall on his knees. He watched his twin starting to clench his fists. He didn't move a single movement, as Hikaru began to tremble rapidly.

"W-what are you saying, Kaoru?" the elder spoke in a shaking voice, hardly could find out why Kaoru was this cold.

Kaoru placed his hands in his pockets, his eyes half-lifted up. He kept on his cold expression.

_Take this all away_

He walked out of the room, ignoring the calls Hikaru yelled at him.

As he closed the door behind him, he leaned up against it, slowly gliding downwards until he reached the floor.

He had held this cold-mask on for long enough, and he was about to weep out of disaster. The true was that he almost broke down in front of the members, but held his calm behind the cold-hearted façade. It was hard, but he needed to go through this.

"_Tell me what the fuck is wrong with me, I'm suffocating."_ The teen sat there, moving his legs closer, so that his knees were in front of him. His hands wrapped on the shoulders, as he hid the face of him. _"I'm sick of acting fake."_

_I throw it off, I'm sick of pretending, had enough of this shit_

_I've given up at this, the act is over, curtains drawn across the scene, it's over for you and me_

"H-Hikaru…"Kaoru chocked, beginning to sob his tears out.

He couldn't find any other words to speak, as the name was the only one that went through his quivering lips.

"_Take this pain away, throw this misery,"_ he cried, didn't really care if anyone heard him cursing to himself.

"Just _kill the fuck of me, I'm already dead."_ The teen sobbed even harder this time, wondering if he were meant to feel this disaster.

_I throw it off, I'm sick of pretending, had enough of this shit_

He didn't know how long he had been sitting there, he just didn't thought anymore. All these things he had been through, they kept on killing him inside. But for the sake of his twin brother, he didn't show his pain, when people were around. Hell, Hikaru didn't have any glue of how Kaoru was suffering.

Kaoru lifted himself off the floor, but as he did that, the door behind him swung open with his twin standing in the doorway. He, without thinking, turned quickly around to face his brother. Hikaru had been standing by the door, feeling his twin's presence on the other side, and then had his hand quickly pulling on the handle, when he could sense that Kaoru was about to leave.

The twins stood unmoved from their places, both of them didn't know what to do.

The tension was high around them, as everything went silent.

"K-Kaoru…" Hikaru was the one to start, his voice was shaking and quiet.

He might have been crying, reassured Kaoru. He could sense his twin slowly starting to tremble again.

"Please. I don't know what it is that I have done so badly, but please please! Don't do this."

Kaoru felt completely sick, he just wanted to get away.

He tried to run his way from it all. Hikaru snatched his hand before he could move any longer.

"Stay here!" the elder begged desperately, and tears were on their way out of Kaoru's eyes.

'_Damn those tears!'_ The younger cursed inside. He didn't want to face Hikaru, not when he was this frustrated.

"L-let go of me, Hikaru…" he managed to choke out through his sobs and pushed on Hikaru's hand to get free, still keeping the eye contact away.

But his twin tightened the grip on his wrist, not wanting him to go.

Kaoru cried more, "Damn it, damn it, damn it!" he whispered in frustration, trying to get away from the person he cared for.

The other members of the host club remained in silence, as they watched the two how they argued. The younger, who tried to get away from the pain - and the elder, who kept on holding his brother firmly. They weren't about to interfere, because it was beyond their permission.

Kaoru couldn't take it any longer. The younger twin collapsed on his knees, sobbing out his misery in despair.

He didn't know what to do, nor did he know who he was anymore. He had been this cold for so long, so jealous and horrible that it even made him sick of thinking it. That wasn't how the real Kaoru was, no, the real Kaoru was mature, smart and caring. He was more sensitive and cared for the most. Not the current Kaoru, this Kaoru was childish, stupid and a cry-baby. This one was out of his mind and was in misery. The old Kaoru's smile was warm and bright, while the current smile was cold and fake at every part.

_I'm suffocating,_

_Tell me what the fuck is wrong,_

_With me_

He haven't felt this loneliness before, it was worse than he had felt during the pass-time. It was like he was all alone, against the whole world, all by himself.

Kaoru opened his mouth to speak.

"I give up," _- I've given up at this,_

"I cut out the act," _- The act is over,_

"I can't take it any longer," _- Curtains drawn across the scene,_

The elder wrapped his arms around his quivering brother's torso, soothing in whisper, "Shhh, it's alright now,"

Hikaru held his younger twin in a loving embrace.

"I love you, Kaoru."

_It's over._

_

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**Kuni:** I suck… LIKE PATHETICLY!! This was no good. I'm so bad at this… Well, I hope that you found the story good enough, because I'm ridiculous! 8D This was based on one of my own poetries. It's called 'The Act is Over', and I thought that it could be a good part of a song fiction, but I haven't found any melodies to the poetry yet.

**Sis:** Like you're ever going to find one…

**Kuni:** I'M WORKING ON IT! -Sighs- But I do feel bad for making Kaoru so sad and angsty, DON'T HIT ME! -Covers the face-

**Sis:** -Sweat drops-

**Kuni:** Oh yeah, I would like to hear from your reviews, thanks!

**Sis:** Yeah right, like there will be any…

**Kuni: **...

**Sis:** Uh-oh…


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